CALLING MYSELF
Ps 26:1-3VINDICATE ME, O Lord, for I have walked in my integrity; I have [expectantly] trusted in, leaned on, and relied on the Lord without wavering and I shall not slide.
2 Examine me, O Lord, and prove me; test my heart and my mind.
3 For Your loving-kindness is before my eyes, and I have walked in Your truth [faithfully].
As I was moving my laptop, cell phone, and assorted books and papers from one room to another, the "regular" phone rang. I hurriedly set down my stuff and rushed to answer the call before the answering machine kicked in. "Hello," I said. No reply. I said hello again when I heard rustling, but still no response. So I hung up and went back to my stuff on the floor. When I picked up my cell phone I realized that I had accidentally speed-dialed my home phone number!
I laughed at myself, but then wondered: How often are my prayers more like calling myself than calling on God?
For example, when I am falsely accused, I plead with God for vindication. I want my name cleared and the guilty person held accountable for the harm done to my reputation. But then I get impatient with God and try to vindicate myself. I may as well be praying to myself.
Vindication does not come from self-defensive arguments; it stems from integrity (Ps. 26:1). It requires that I allow God to examine my mind and heart (v.2) and that I walk in His truth (v.3). This, of course, requires patient waiting (25:21).
Let integrity and uprightness preserve me, for I wait for and expect You.
When we call on God, He will help us--but in His perfect time and in His perfect way.
The purpose of prayer is not to get what we want, but to become what God wants.


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